The Rite. 2011

I knew from the beginning of this film that I would not like it. The set up was just so predictable. Young priest (Michael)...who only becomes a priest to escape a life he doesn't want (his father's mortuary business) goes to Italy to take an exorcism class.

A few things popped in my head at this moment.

what does inspired by a true story even mean?
Haven't I seen this movie already?
When does Anthony Hopkins enter into this?
Haven't I seen this movie already?

I asked that question twice because I really thought i had already seen this movie...turns out I hadn't. The movie was just another generic Hollywood exorcism movie.

It used to be that when a movie was based on a real event you were told that the following was based on a true story or based on true events (See The Mothman Prophecies). Things have changed. Real life is not as exciting as it used to be. The public needs to see more blood than the average human has or needs to see "more" demons...so we get:

inspired by true events.

Its kind of win win for all of us. The filmmakers are no longer constrained by the the truth and we get to see more ridiculous scenes with blood and floating. Besides, if I wanted to watch a movie where people appear possessed and do ridiculous things I would go see The Undefeated.

-Anyway, where were we?-

Michael's Dad (played by Rutger Hauer) is a mortician
Michael, who doesn't want to be a mortician and is haunted by his Mother's death, runs away to become a priest...even though he doesn't believe. (that's important!)
After graduating from the seminary he has the opportunity to go to Rome to take part in a class about Exorcisms. More importantly- a class to teach priest to become actual Exorcists. I knew that in the last few years the Catholic Church has amped up the Demon patrol- so that part was pretty cool. see article

Then "she" walks in! UGH.

The device in which filmmakers get the attractive distraction/lover/femme fatale/(or in this case a journalist) into this movie just didn't work for me. They just plop her into this exorcism class. She (Angeline) apparently has received full access to this class and its members with the understanding (I assume from the Church) that she is going to write a piece for her magazine. Which I decide to let go right away in fear that I would otherwise turn the movie off. She, of course, finds Michael intriguing because he doesn't believe but he's still a priest...blah blah blah...conflicted...blah blah blah.

Then, thankfully, enters Father Lucas Trevant (Sir Anthony Hopkins). Yes- he delivers his lines in the same fashion as most of his movies as a character he has played in most of his movies but he is a great change to Michael and Angeline who quite frankly bore me since by now, in most big budget films, would have slept together in standard movie slow motion. I am not saying Hopkins is not a good actor but if you look at a few highlights: The Wolfman, Fracture, Instinct, and the Hannibal Lector movies you notice a pattern...which is not to say that quite a few actors have made careers on playing the same old character movie after movie...i am looking at you Nicholas Cage!

I digress.

Boom! Father Lucas is a hard core Exorcist. In it for the long haul. Michael hangs out with him on a few and then a little bit more than halfway into the movie you get the twist. Father Lucas is himself possessed! HOLY SHIT...did I see that coming? well, yes. Yes I did.

then the best scene from the entire movie happens.




Then Michael finds the poor Father sitting outside his house dazed, confused, and soaking wet from the rain. He gets him inside and Father Lucas tells Michael that he needs his help. Michael can't really help him because he doesn't believe...

Then we get this nugget

"You can only defeat it when you believe."

So- you see what is gonna happen- Father Lucas's demon comes forward, Angeline shows up but is locked outside the door, Michael tries his best but the demon (and Father Lucas) is much cooler than him. but wait...

you remember Hulk Hogan? If you have ever seen him wrestle you know that at some point his opponent is gonna have him in a sleeper. It is at this point the ref is is gonna lift up one of his arms...then its gonna fall to the mat. The ref will do this again...
OH NO! the ref got to 2!! C'mon Hulk!

Then the ref does this a third time but instead of his arm flopping to the mat...it holds! the opponent looks in disbelief and the crowd goes absolutely ape shit. Hulk...because of the crowd regains his strength and wins the day!


fuck yeah brother!

Michael has a renewed faith and is now bound and determined to get this demons name!
Yep- you learn early on that one can only gain power over a demon if one gets the demons name. (It's Ba'al by the way) Then the exorcist gains that power over that demon and can then successfully get rid of it. nice right?

Michael gets the demons name (suspiciously easily) and the demon leaves Father Lucas.

Then the movie kind of just ends...which is fine since the demon is gone and all.

Father Lucas keeps on keeping on.
Angeline writes her article.
Michael continues as a priest.
I, quite wearily, turn the DVD player off.


what I learned.

1. Exorcisms, although quite exhausting, can be done by novices
2. Anthony Hopkins is still very good at being Hannibal Lector.

can you miss this movie, yes. yes you can.